(free download of the first 20 chapters)

The Power of Being Different

A Success Formula

by

John Paul Carinci

Edited by Donald MacLaren

© Copyright 2004 John Paul Carinci

Dedication

To my father - one of the greatest inspirations in my life, the person I strive to emulate.  He was what we all should be - loving and unselfish to the very end.

            To my mother – who taught me that I was capable of much more than an average effort.

            To my wife, Vera – the love of my life, who tamed a wild bull.

Contents

Chapter 1                                 Uniqueness Leads to Great Success

Chapter 2                                Time is a Precious Gift

Chapter 3                                The Little Things That Make All The Difference

Chapter 4                                A Positive Attitude

Chapter 5                                The Miracle of Life

Chapter 6                                It’s a Great Day to Be Alive

Chapter 7                                The Mind Over the Body

Chapter 8                                The Subconscious Mind

Chapter 9                                Positive Reaffirming

Chapter 10                              Perseverance: A Trait To Learn

Chapter 11                              Positive Visualization

Chapter 12                              Your Mind As a Filter

Chapter 13                              Happiness – It’s All Around You

Chapter 14                              The Magic of Believing

Chapter 15                              Preventing Success

Chapter 16                              Understanding Negative Habits

Chapter 17                              The Magic In Selling

Chapter 18                              Getting Enthusiasm Back Into Your Life

Chapter 19                              Faith In Yourself

Chapter 20                              Burning Desire

Chapter 21                              Remembering Where You Came From

Chapter 22                              Don’t Be Nonchalant About Life

Chapter 23                              The Power of Belief

Chapter 24                              Dissatisfaction Accomplishes More

Chapter 25                              Death Can Be A Motivating Force

Chapter 26                              I Must Be More Now!

Self-Suggestion Statements

Suggested Reading

Nothing in the world can take the

                                                     place of persistence. Talent will not;

                                                     nothing is more common than unsuccessful

                                                     men with talent. Genius will not;

                                                     unrewarded genius is almost a proverb.

                                                     Education will not; the world is full of

                                                     educated derelicts. Persistence and

                                                     determination alone are omnipotent.

                                                                                   --Calvin Coolidge

                                                                                      30^th President of the United States

                                                                                      (1923-1929)

Uniqueness Leads To Great Success

Some men see things as they are and say ‘why?’

                                          I dream things that never were, and say, ‘why not?’

                                                                                       --George Bernard Shaw

                                                                                          English Dramatist

                                                                                          (1856-1950)

Time Moves Faster Than Us

The older one gets, the faster time seems to move. It is my observation that life goes by too fast. Most young people feel it is taking an eternity to become 18 and then 21, so strong is the urge to be considered an adult man or woman. The young man of 21 will soon discover that time seems to move at a faster speed than he realized when he becomes a 35-year-old man. That childhood urge to speed up time will now change into a wish to slow it down when the man reaches 45 and 50.  Where are you in your life’s journey? Is time speeding up or slowing down for you? At what stage are you?

Do your days seem crammed full of obligations, tasks, deadlines, with a lot less spare time? Are there days when you are so stressed that you would like to drop out of society? Dropping out of society, and disappearing from all the stresses is basically a fantasy, one we all experience at one time or another.

You cannot control the speed of time, but you can control what you accomplish within your limited time. The proper use of work in a time period creates greater success.

Turning A Small Amount of Time Into A Lot of Time

To accomplish more of your personal goals, whether writing, reading, painting, participating in sports, or exercising, you can start by thinking of giving yourself more time in small amounts and forgetting about trying to give the world all your time.

Consider the importance of a 15-minute block of time a day to do something meaningful for yourself. Those “extra” 15 minutes a day would amount to 105 minutes, or 1 3/4 hours a week. If you continue squeezing out those 15 minutes a day, they would equal more than 7 hours a month and more than 91 hours a year. What could you accomplish with your “extra” 91 hours per year?

You could have jogged approximately 350 miles in that year,  read approximately 10 new books, or taken a course. You could have prepared for an entirely new field of work or a great new

hobby.

It's a lot easier than you think to capture these valuable 15 minutes a day. How you use your time determines what you accomplish in life.

If you allow eight hours sleeping, you are left with 16 hours for working and thinking.  And of these 16 hours, you have to allow time for travel, eating, and socializing. If budgeted properly, you can squeeze out that extra 15 minutes a day that you can call “your time.”

Suppose you have been given a $10,000.00 fee as a “time consultant” whose job it is to find those extra 15 minutes every day that can be your time. For the $10,000.00, you can start to write down the wasted minutes. Where are the wasted minutes every day?

Here are some ideas: Can you take a more direct route to work that would give you extra time?  Can you take 15 minutes less for lunch?  Can you get up 15 minutes earlier to accomplish something?  Can you have a lighter dinner that would free up those 15 extra minutes at night?

Once you figure out how to capture that little block of time, you can write the findings down and make 10 copies of how you will always give yourself an extra 15 minutes per day. You can be persistent in finding those extra 15 minutes, so you can keep reminding yourself that these are your “new” minutes for you to accomplish something new.

The second step requires that you write down what you want to accomplish in those 15 minutes.

A good habit will take approximately 20 days to form. Your new block of time will change your life, if you accomplish something greater in those 15 minutes!

If a man does not keep pace with his companions,

                                        perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer.

                                        Let him step to the music which he hears, however

                                        measured or far away.

                                                                                   --Henry David Thoreau

                                                                                      Author/Naturalist

                                                                                      (1817-1862)

Be Different

Be unique. Be different. Stop following the crowd. Listen for the sound of that distant drum. The successful person and the average person approach life differently.  The average person, it

seems to me, likes to take the easy way out. It's almost as if the average person wants to get through work just to rush home to do very little, or nothing at all.

Television is often a thief of your time and can easily be the source of your losing 15 minutes a day that could be used to accomplish more worthwhile goals. Perhaps watching one less television show will create better opportunities for yourself. Why watch other people become successful when you can apply yourself to those extra 15 minutes every day?

People can too often fail because they do not “stay focused.”  Remember that staying focused on the small goals is the way you accomplish the final goal. Think for a moment about a movie

camera. Until the lens focuses on a particular object, everything is blurry. Although you may want to accomplish many different things in unrelated fields, you may be dabbling in many fields at

the same time and not putting enough energy into one goal.

Instead, remain focused, as if you are trying to line up a photo of a rose, capturing it in sharp detail.  The camera lens has to stay focused or everything becomes blurry.

You must stay focused and not try to do everything at once. To hit a home run in baseball, you must have the bat make contact with the baseball at precisely the right part of the bat, hitting

the right part of the ball exactly with the right force of the swing. Any deviation from these elements can result in a complete miss or a pop-up. It takes minute differences to hit the ball just

right for a home run.

Focus. You may find it hard to stay focused at first. Remember this rule: a new habit takes about three weeks to form.

In a 1985 monthly publication of Insight, there is an article about Andrew Carnegie, the great steel maker, who was asked by a reporter, “How is it possible to have 43 millionaires working for you at the same time?”

Mr. Carnegie answered, “They weren't millionaires when they started working for me.” The reporter asked, “Well, what  happened?” Mr. Carnegie replied, “We believe in rewarding

excellence in performance, and these men have developed themselves to the degree that they have become millionaires.”

The reporter asked, “How do you develop so many people?”

            Andrew Carnegie replied this way: “I develop men exactly the same way you mine gold. In order to get an ounce of gold, you move tons and tons of dirt. But you don't go looking for the dirt; you go looking for the gold.”

When interviewed by Success Magazine in 1898 Thomas Edison was asked, “What's the first requisite for success?” And Edison answered this way: “The ability to apply your physical and mental energies to one problem incessantly without growing weary. You do something all day long, don't you? Everyone does. If you get up at 7 A.M. and go to bed at 11 P.M., you have put in 16 good hours, and it is certain with most men that they have been doing something all the time. The only trouble is that they do it about a great many things and I do it about one. If they took the time in question and applied it in one direction, to one object they would succeed.”

Leadership

Why are very few people leaders? Many people are followers in general and in most all aspects of life. Many seem to follow others, much like all the mice that fall in line to follow behind the Pied Piper.

            I believe many people are too shy to lead, in whatever situation they are in. The average person, when entering a department store, will follow the person who previously entered the store. People will follow other people through the same exact door, no matter that other doors are more accessible. People tend to follow the path of a predecessor. People do the same thing because it's easier that way. It takes more commitment, work, and determination to find and to independently accomplish something new and better.

            In a casino, if there is an empty roulette or blackjack table, people will usually walk right by it. But as soon as one person sits down at the table, it's amazing how the table fills up with new people following the lead of the person who first sat down. Why? Maybe people think that they would miss out on something good, so they join the lone player.

            It has been known that in the former Soviet Union, people were so used to standing on line that, once a line formed, other people automatically joined on the long line. They didn't want to miss out on whatever was for sale.

            Who can be the leader of the pack?  Anyone. With just a little imagination and determination, anyone can come up with new ideas to lead the way.

            Remember, many people we know will be the followers, and will expect us to follow the followers also. I'm in no way saying this to degrade or make fun of people, but merely to bring out a point of truth. The average person is often not aware of the strong urge to “follow the crowd.”

Being Different In Order To Accomplish Greater Goals

Being different means standing up, standing out, and leading.  Too many people are content to be followers.  Do you dare to be different?   

            One must plan to be different.  You can start to love being different so that “being different” will become a good habit. You can make a plan and practice being different. You do not have to

be like everyone else. You can mentally note each and every time that you are different. You can go out of your way to do something that makes you stand out from the crowd. 

            Be different – be better!  You can't miss with that attitude. With a new modified success attitude, you will become successful.

John Quincy Adams said, “If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader.”

The inventor of the disposable Gillette razor blade, King Camp Gillette, was a traveling salesman who sold bottle stoppers. He got the razor idea one morning in 1895 while shaving with a dull razor. It took 8 years of pure struggle and frustration to market the first double edge disposable shaving blade to the public. He had to find the right combination of metal alloy and tempering. 

He also had to find the financial backing needed.  In the process, he experienced tremendous ridicule and failure. It was almost too much to bear.

            In 1903 the first Gillette blade and razor were sold to the public, and since then more than 100 billion Gillette blades have been sold.

            “I didn't know enough to quit,” the inventor once said. “I was a dreamer who believed in the gold at the foot of the rainbow. I dared to go where wise ones feared to tread.”

            Gillette had absolutely no experience in inventing, in engineering, or in working different forms of metals and alloys.

            He had not the slightest idea of what he would encounter. But he had an idea, a dream, an inspiration and a belief that it could be done and, despite all the obstacles, he achieved his goal.

            Don't you think there were more experienced and knowledgeable experts, engineers, and inventors than Mr. Gillette who could have invented this fantastic razor? No doubt there were thousands of people who had the potential to invent a new and better razor. What held them back? Apparently no one else had the foresight, imagination, or the burning desire to replace the antiquated shaving instrument that everyone accepted as sufficient. Others couldn't visualize a piece of metal as thin as paper, yet strong enough to slice through tough whiskers.

At times, your common sense will interfere with your creative imagination. Your common sense will tell you all the reasons you cannot do something and all those reasons are likely true. But then you have to stop to realize your brain has something greater than common sense.

            We are each born with creative imagination. Successful people are the ones who have learned how to apply their creative imagination in order to achieve greater goals. Being successful can mean being more imaginative, not necessarily being smarter than someone else.

If your common sense says no, that’s the time to test your options.  It’s your creative imagination that has the ability to overcome every it-can’t-be-done attitude and common sense worry.

Consider how much any inventor has had to endure ridicule during the development stage of the invention. The criticism and the negativity from others could easily have defeated all the major inventors. Imagine the world without all the major inventions if the inventors had given up. Too many people give up on their ideas, telling themselves, “I can’t do it.” That amounts to accepting defeat before they have even tried.

Thomas Edison was laughed at when he tried to sell the idea of the light bulb. People did not understand the concept; they were happy using their gaslights. His skeptics kept asking, “How does Edison expect to light anything without using a flame or a fire of some kind?”

Skeptics have a difficult time in accepting change.

Thomas Edison is a great example of someone who did not give up. From his creative imagination and hard work, we have his legacy of the electric light bulb, motion pictures, the telephone transmitter, the stock ticker, the phonograph and the electric pen for the mimeograph.

Thank God, Thomas Alva Edison did not let his skeptics, his common sense, and all his failed experiments defeat him. I wonder how many times his common sense started telling him, “It can’t be done.” Success means you have to be willing to risk not listening to your common sense.

Alexander Graham Bell, the inventor of the telephone, had a difficult time convincing others the telephone invention would work. People accepted the telegraph as the means of communication because that already worked and people follow what works. Bell used his creative imagination to go to the next step: imagining that people could speak into a piece of metal and their voices would travel across the country over a wire in a split second.

            To use your creative imagination will require research and hard work.

            You can succeed in your ultimate goal if you have the conviction to persevere through all the negative attitudes and through your failed attempts.

Your goal may not come easily, but success usually comes to those who persist, those who choose to be different.

The spirit, the will to win,

                                                           and the will to excel are the

                                                           things that endure. These qualities

                                                           are so much more important than

                                                           the events that occur.

                                                                                                                                                --Vince Lombardi

                                                                                                 Football Coach

                                                                                                 (1913-1970)

Time Is A Precious Gift

When it's all over, all said and

                                                        done, What impact will your life

                                                        have had on the world?

                                                                                     --John Paul Carinci

                                                                                        Insurance Executive

The Question of a Lifetime

Your life is such a great asset. As you grow, you learn to protect your life, to take care of your health, and to nurture your mind. But, do you really put the right effort in making the most of this gift called life? You don't have to discover a new invention or be the president of the country, but you do have the responsibility to ask yourself, Do you consciously try to make the world better?

How have you made it a better place in which to live? In what ways have you had positive, lasting effects on others? What special innovation will you be remembered for? Will people think of you as a doer, a visionary, a leader who accomplished something better? Or, will people remember you for having wasted your abilities?

These are tough questions. Most people may not want to think about these questions. The average person tends to ask, “How can I get as much as possible for me?” and seldom asks, “How can I give to the world?”

Be honest with yourself. Are you content with what you've done thus far? Have you done enough for others? What will you ultimately be remembered for? If you truly would like to change your future, you can. You simply have to be willing to modify the way you think.

My premise is this: You have the capacity to do great things by the use of your creative imagination.

The secret to change is, first, to tell yourself that you want to change. Tell yourself every day you want to improve something in your life. Work on small goals that lead to your greater goals.

Those who have benefited from attending Alcoholics Anonymous have had to start with an admission: “I have a problem.” The admission of a problem creates the mental attitude that brings about a new result.

The first step in bringing about positive change is to admit that you want to change. Be specific about what you want to change. Will power is a tremendous tool. Once a person becomes determined to do something, and blocks out all external negative thoughts, that person usually succeeds in his or her desired goal.

The more you tell yourself that you want to improve, the more your subconscious will begin thinking of ways to achieve that goal. You can train your mind to think positively.

Your Mortality

Most of us come to admit that life is short. Once you reach the age of forty the fact that life is short sticks in your mind.            You can use your own mortality as a way of staying focused.

The awareness of your mortality can even motivate you to quicken your pace of accomplishments.

You have 24 hours in every day, 168 hours in a week, and about 16 waking hours every day. That's 112 waking hours every week.

If you are a 40-year-old man with a normal life expectancy, you have approximately 16,425 more days to live, assuming you live to age 85. Women live three years longer on average. If you decided to find 20 minutes a day over a five-year period, you would accumulate about 609 hours of “extra time” to do what you wanted. Those 609 hours could change your life.

If I were to invest my 609 hours into learning to paint, don't you think after 609 hours I would be pretty knowledgeable about painting? Imagine what new things you could accomplish if you improved your life twenty minutes at a time every day.

Leo Tolstoy, the famous Russian writer, said, “Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself.”

In the entertainment field, an actor with as few as five years acting experience can become a director because of what he has learned about directing on-the-job.

In Working Smarter, a cassette program by Michael LeBoeuf, Ph.D., published by Nightingale Conant Corp., the following story appeared: “Charles Schwab, when he was President of Bethlehem Steel many years ago, called in Ivy Lee, a consultant, and said to him, ‘Show me a way to get more things done with my time, and I'll pay you any fee within reason.' Lee replied, 'Fine. I'll give you something in 20 minutes that will step up your output at least 50%.'

With that, Lee handed Schwab a blank piece of paper and said, 'Write down the six most important things you have to do tomorrow and number them in order of importance. Now put this piece of paper in your pocket. First thing tomorrow morning look at item one and start working on it until you finish it; then do item two, and so on; do this until quitting time and don't be concerned if you've only finished one or two. You'll be working on the most important ones anyway. If you can't finish them all by this method, you couldn't have done it by any other method either, and

without some system you'd probably not even have decided which was the most important.'

Then Lee said, 'Try this system every working day. After you’ve convinced yourself of the value of this system, have your men try it.  Try it as long as you wish, then send me a check for

what you think it's worth.'

Several weeks later Schwab sent Lee a check for $25,000, with a note, proclaiming the advice, ‘the most profitable he'd ever followed.’ The concept helped Charles Schwab earn 100 million

dollars and turned Bethlehem Steel into the biggest independent steel producer in the world.”

Charles Schwab thought enough of this idea to pay $25,000 for it, but only after he and his workers used it and proved it worthwhile.

            Since early on in my career, I have used a similar “To Do List.” I’ve found that the list helps me accomplish more and accomplish it faster. The to-do list keeps me focused and I avoid wasting time on the less important things.

I’ve presented you with a system worth $25,000, a gift for organizing your time. Try this system for four weeks. Then, look back and see how much you have accomplished. How much would you pay for such a system? I’ve found the system worth thousands of dollars to me over my twenty-plus years in sales.